A living suicide note

We were in love but now she isn’t.

I was successful then now I am not. I was a speaker, now I could just sob. I was an actor but now I could only do melodrama. I was a singer but now it’s only melancholy. I was a writer but now I am out of words. She stole my vision and pushed me into the life of ordinary people,that is, to live, to reproduce and to die.

So now, I am left with one choice. The choice is to live as a burden to one’s own self or to die to relieve from endless suffering.

I can’t choose to die for none can. I will live for people who believe in me. I will struggle for people who are comfortable with back stabbing. I will live as how any daughter does for his mother and will serve as how any son does for his father. I will save the reputation of family and live like the living humans.

I am not going to wait for the Grimm reaper to knock my door but when he arrives with death as gift, I won’t reject it. I’ll embrace it like I embraced my life after love.

I’ll end my eternal suffering with my death with no need to ever love again.

-ARunesh AR


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